Time Is Just A Moment And It's Passing By Too Fast

I was going to post on Mother's day, but realized that my last post was on Easter and I don't want this to become a thing where I only post on holidays. And then the moment left and I hadn't written anything here and it just sat for a bit longer.

My brother and his family came over today and I asked two of my nephews if they wanted to make cookies with me. They eagerly said yes and ran to the kitchen to help. I used to dislike cooking with kids because it always seems to take longer and be messier, but lately I really have grown to love it. The three year old, who thinks he is Batman - so that is what I will call him here, wanted to help dump the ingredients into the bowl and smell the cookie dough as it mixed in the mixer. It was adorable, and his nine year old brother was the same. They were eager to help and really wanted to taste the dough at each stage, which I did not permit because cookie dough doesn't taste good until it's done.

After I put a batch of cookies in the oven Batman wanted to watch them cook, so I went to help him down from the stool he was sitting on and he defiantly said "No! I can just jump off because I'm Batman!" and then proceeded to jump off the stool and run over to the oven to watch the cookie dough "melt".

It is these small little moments that remind me why I love being an aunt so much. It's the messes in the kitchen and the jumping and playing that makes each moment with them so precious. Before long they'll be all grown up and won't want to bake cookies with me anymore. They won't even want to come visit. And I'll wish I had enjoyed those moments more with them when I could. How quickly life passes us by! How quickly those moments slip through our fingers!

Thankfully, Batman is only three and will, hopefully, love making cookies with me for a long long time because he's such a fun kid to have help.

I have been working on a novella lately. It might become a novel, I don't know. I haven't decided yet. There's definitely enough material to make it a novel, but it's a fairy tale, so I kind of wanted to keep it shorter. But it has unlocked so much of LIGHTS background and history. And it's only expanding further and further. It's amazing!! I thought I'd give you a little taste of it, so here you go!

Little background, because this is literally the middle of a chapter that is not at the beginning...Ethne is Cinderella and Keegan is the prince, but Ethne doesn't know he's the prince because he's pretending to be a commoner and is working in a blacksmith shop. He is from a kingdom that can control fire (hence the blacksmith shop) and was the first person Ethne met when she found herself in Solais, which is the kingdom Ian (in LIGHTS) is from. Ethne is training to be a warrior, which she was destined to be because her mother was also a warrior. The warrior's belong to a group called The Order.

One day, two months after her arrival, Ethne was walking by the blacksmith shop when Keegan came outside. He bowed respectfully to her, which Ethne had grown accustom to. It was the common greeting for all those in the Order. She bowed in return and when she stood again she noticed Keegan grinning like a fool.

“Why are you so happy this morning?” She asked.

“I have just received a letter from home.” He told her.

“Oh? And what was in this letter?” She wished he’d just tell her, but he was having too much fun dragging this out.

“There is to be a ball back in my kingdom. The king and queen have just announced it. And I am hoping to attend. They say it’s to be a masquerade. You have not lived until you have seen their ballroom. The entire length of the ceiling is lit by a fire that never goes out.” He explained. Ethne had never been to a ball. She had never even heard of an opportunity to go to one.

“How interesting. What is the occasion?” She tried not to sound too eager as she asked. He chuckled lightly before answering,

“You, of course.” He stated.

“Me? Why would they be having a ball for me?” She was truly perplexed at the thought.

“Because you are of the Order and all those who are new to the order attend a ball in their honor when their training is complete. Your training will be finished soon and a ball must be had.” He explained.

“But why in another kingdom? I’ve never left Solais, why won’t they host it?” She wondered aloud to him.

“Because Solais is just part of this world. The rest of the world wishes to honor its newest warrior. The work you will do here is truly remarkable and we all wish to pay our respect for your efforts on our behalf.” He said. There was a glimmer that shined from the corner of his eyes as he spoke of her strength and effort. She blushed at the compliment.

“I really haven’t done anything yet. I don’t deserve a ball.” She told him.

“On the contrary. You have already given us hope in the future. You deserve more than just a masquerade ball. But this is one small way we can show you how important you are. You must attend.” He insisted.

“If I must.” She replied, but in her heart she wanted to go. Especially if Keegan would be there.

Any way, there you go, a glimpse into my current WIP. I hope to have this draft done by the end of the week, but I've been saying that for weeks, so we shall see!! Let me know what you thought in the comments!!

A Moment of Reflection

Life sucks. Sometimes. Not all the time. And sometimes November hits you in the face so many times that you're sitting in your room at 1:30 AM looking at the calendar knowing that before you know it, it'll be November 1st and you'll be facing another November. That's me. Right now. Guys, it's almost November.

I'm so sick of social media. If I didn't use social media to promote my own writing, I'd turn it all off and not look at it ever again. Or not until after this election business is over.

Guys, I feel like I have a billion things to say, but every time I try to write them out, I hate the way that I'm saying something and erase the whole thing.

I found out that my favorite Spanish teacher from high school passed away yesterday. It was very sad because he was an amazing teacher. I still remember his class and all that I learned there. Teachers like that don't come around very often. I'm so glad I was able to learn from him. His impact is far reaching. I don't think he could have possibly known how much we all loved him. I hope his family can find comfort in knowing how great he was and how beloved he was of his students.

I wanted to give you guys an excerpt of something I'm working on because I feel like the last few posts have been a bit more me focused and less on my writing, so here you go, an excerpt from the last edit of LIGHTS. It's part of what I gave you last time with a little bit MORE bwa ha ha:

The morning air is crisp as I walk down the familiar streets. It's been years since I've actually looked around. The buildings all reaching high above, argent and black as far as the eye can see. The gray of the buildings almost washes out all colors around me. Reds seem faded, blues turn to gray, green to almost nothing. The yellow sign above the coffee shop door stands out. Perhaps it's the florescent lights indicating that the coffee is hot.

The employees are surprisingly lackluster. I walk in and look at the people. It's a sea of obsidian jackets to compliment their ivory blouses and button up shirts under charcoal blazers all around until someone catches my eye. He is wearing a button up shirt rolled up to his fore arm. A pearl white shirt with a cobalt pinstripe. Despite his relaxed expression, he still looks precise and sharp. Even his rolled up sleeves seem to be rolled to a precise measurement so as to not be too casual or too business like. He seems brighter than everyone else in the little shop. Or even the city. If that's even possible. Like he almost has a glow to him that no one else does. The pages on his book seem almost vibrant. He doesn't look up when I enter but continues reading while the rest of the world ignores him. He has an undefined preoccupation with his watch.

He is oblivious to the world, and yet I feel like he is watching more closely than the rest of us. He checks his watch, looks up briefly before returning to his book. How can he read?

I admit, my fascination is probably bordering on creepy, probably. No one else seems to notice him. It's almost like they can't see him. This morning is no exception. No one sees him, no one talks to him, it's like he's not even here. There is nothing threatening about him. Perhaps that is why no one notices. I thought about asking one of the workers if they know anything about him, but they seem even less personable than usual today. A little thought keeps pestering me to go talk to him. After all, I have time today. It's not even eight in the morning.

“Emma!” Bobby's voice booms around me and my cup comes flying across the counter. He doesn't even look as he throws my cup. I've become a coffee catching ninja as I skillfully snatch it without a drop getting on my scrubs. I check my phone again. 7:52. I walk over to the counter with napkins and grab a couple. I turn to leave and nearly run into the guy I can't stop staring at. He waits for me to notice I'm staring and I laugh awkwardly.

“Sorry about that.” I say and slip past him and head for the door. I feel the deep red of a very embarrassing blush crosses my cheeks. He smiles at me as I leave and in that last glance I notice how fiercely green his eyes are.

I walk quickly down the sidewalk when my phone rings. I glance down to see Marques, my coworker, calling me.

“Hey friend, what's up?” I ask him, surprised that he's beat me to work. I'm usually the first one there.

“Emma. Calahan is here to observe you. Where are you?” He asks in response.

“I'm headed in, I just stopped to get some coffee. I won't be late, promise.” I say.

“You're already 25 minutes late.” He states. There's no way that's possible. I left my house less than ten minutes ago. How can I be late at all? I look at my watch as the faceplate on my watch glaringly switches from 9:25 to 9:26.  

And now, I will be editing and writing some things. And watching the newest episode of Designated Survivor because I missed it when it aired because it was Hugh Jackman's birthday today and I was busy. You can check all that out HERE. 

A little LIGHTS for ya!!

It's been a crazy month, y'all. But really. I've been writing a ton. SO MUCH WRITING. Which is awesome. And I can't wait to share it with you. I can't share all of it, because...reasons...but I will share this little snippet of LIGHTS with you!!

The morning air is crisp as I walk down the familiar streets. It's been years since I've actually looked around. The buildings all reaching high above, argent and black as far as the eye can see. The gray of the buildings almost washes out all colors around me. Reds seem faded, blues turn to gray, green fades to almost nothing. The yellow sign above the coffee shop door does stand out. Perhaps it's the florescent lights indicating that the coffee is hot and the employees are as bored as usual. I walk in and look at the people. It's a sea of black, white and gray business apparel around until I look over the the corner and see Ian in his usual spot. He is wearing a button up shirt that is white with a blue pinstripe, the sleeves rolled up, yet still looking precise and sharp. He doesn't look up when I enter but continues reading while the rest of the world ignores him. I place my order with the Shay at the counter. I have seen her nearly every day for years, and yet I don't think she could pick me out of a crowd. 

Soooooo.....what did you think? Wanna let me know in the comments? That'd be AWESOME!! :)

ALL THE FEELS

We all know of my *slight* addiction to TV shows, especially those of the superhero variety. But dang. Seriously. It has been a rough go of my shows lately. The writers are killing people left and right. It's like Injustice: Year 1, Issue 16 when Dick Grayson is accidentally killed by Damian Wayne. In the midst of this huge battle between Batman and Superman and their respective teams a single moment stands out. and suddenly you're ugly crying to the point that you have to put your comic down because you can't read you're crying so hard.

That's been me watching my shows. So many character deaths. Ugh. I hate it. Some are short and quick, like on The Flash last week, and others have been awful and drawn out. #savehook. Writers. You're killing me. And the feels. Oh the feels. I hate trying to explain why I'm ugly crying over a show. *sob*sob* "you just don't get it! It was his dad! The only family he had left! *sob*sob* and now he's gone!!" more sobbing. more ugly crying. All over fictional characters. This is my life.

And then, there's the other aspects of my life. Job searching. It's the worst. I hate spending hours a day filling out applications to companies that aren't even going to email me to let me know they're not interested. I feel like my information just goes into a black hole of nothingness sometimes.

I actually applied for a job that would potentially lead to my dream job. I saw the listing about this time last Thursday night/Friday morning and applied for it. And now comes the waiting game. The constant worry that I might not even hear back from them. That somehow the awesomeness of my resume and writing sample will some how not impress whoever I sent it to. If they even look at it. And my dream job could easily slip through my fingers. I'm not saying this to be negative, I'm just saying this because it's consuming my soul and I'm tired of it consuming my soul. I'm just tired. And not just because it's 2:32 AM and I'm still awake after finishing this season of iZombie. It's more than that.

In light of my above little outburst of emotion, I have decided to share with you a poem that I wrote. This is me putting myself completely out in the open as a writer. I am not a poet by nature and I struggled hard core in my intermediate poetry class, and the following poem is the result. That semester I was hooked on LIGHTS and couldn't help but write, like, all of my poems about Emma, Ian and Donovan. So, this poem is called Starlit Dreams and it's from Emma's perspective after she's lost Ian:

Starlit Dreams

I watch for every flicker

lighting the corners of my

eyes, and into my imagination.

Each night as I sleep, I hope

beyond the truth, the seconds

trickle past and tease me. A broken watch

remains, last proof that he is real. An echo

of his rich laugh a fire and coals on a cold day.

His fingers slipped from my neck, pausing

briefly at the base, like a waterfall

pooling. Waiting, holding, hoping

that time does not move past

his eyes. Deep caverns with a spark of light

that guides the weary strangers. I

caress the memory of waking

up beside him, the sting of winter kept

away by the warmth of his smile.

I dream of silver trees next to

ocean breezes after a storm

with hope and starlit dreams.

I may have broken someone's heart yesterday and although I don't regret that I did it, I do hope that I didn't cause more damage than necessary. It's made me stop and think a lot about how we treat other people. A LOT of people that I care about in my life have given me a lot of advice on how I should approach things. I listened to them for a while, but when I'm alone, and especially after I've spent some time reading my scriptures and contemplating my life, I have come to realize a few things. First, that how I personally feels does, in fact, matter. Second, that although we should give everyone a really good chance, that doesn't always mean that things are going to go the way you or other people think they will. Third, don't waste people's time. I feel really bad about that one because I think I wasted more time than I should have. I should have been more direct, but I was worried I would hurt someone or not give them enough of a chance. Instead, I put it off a lot longer than I should have. Which happens. Ugh. Feelings. They're killing me, guys. You can't live with them, and you can't live without them. I kind of feel like Barry Allen on tonight's The Flash. There's a moment towards the end of the episode where there's a big reveal and he can't handle it anymore and he goes out into the hallway and just collapses on the ground and is sitting there with his elbows resting on his knees and his face in his hands and there's tears streaming down his face. He just couldn't handle the emotions anymore. That's me mentally. I'm beyond my breaking point emotionally. Which is what it is. And I'll find the strength along the way. But dang. ALL THE FEELS. I tell you what, they're not so bueno. 

Soozee's Random Writing Tip

Are you sick of me posting stuff yet? It's like I can't stop writing now that I'm out of school. I CAN'T STOP!! And I love it! It makes me so happy! And today I have been working on LIGHTS. Oh, I love this story! I love where it's going and where we've been with it and soon I get to crush Ian's poor little heart. Which is going to break Emma's heart. And Trent/Donovan (spoiler) is going to get crushed sort of. But not really because he wasn't *actually* in love with her. Because he's evil at the moment. But oh, so attractive.

Any way, the point of this post. Over the last two years I discovered something. There are a number of Mumford and Sons songs that I just can't get over when I'm writing. I have a whole playlist of their songs that listen to on repeat. When I need to channel some rage (usually when writing about Donovan) I listen to the song White Blank Page. There's a line in there that I can't get over too. It goes "Can you kneel before the King and say I'm clean?" and I know that it seems simple and maybe unpoetic or even nonsensical, but those words, man, they've got POWER and I LOVE THEM.

When I need to channel some unrequited love (even though I'm the freaking queen of it) I listen to I Will Wait as well as Not With Haste. When I need to write about hope and faith I listen to Babel and Below My Feet. "Keep the earth below my feet. From my sweat, my blood runs weak. Let me learn from where I have been. Keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn." Such beautiful words. #56 on my bucket list is to have Mumford and Sons write an original song for one of my movies. I would LOVE for them to write a song for LIGHTS when it's made into a movie because their music has become so intertwined in my writing process for that story. In so many ways, their music is the unplayed soundtrack. When I finish this book and it gets published and you all go pick up a copy of it, I recommend listening to Mumford and Sons while you read it (if you are one of those people that can listen to music while you read) OR, read the book, then go listen to Mumford and Sons and hear my story intertwine with their words and be happy. Be excessively happy. Because it would make me happy. :)

In other news, I found another actor I would love to cast as Jason Tyde. Seriously, peoples, I keep recasting these parts in my head, but it always helps me picture the story better. I have cast Emma in my head which is the first girl I have cast outside of Iridium. Have I even told you guys about Iridium?! I don't think I have. That's a whole other post. And so is this last paragraph. I'ma just leave this here and will get back to it next time I blog. Which will probably be in, like, 3 days or something. I'm totally addicted. Be excited.

Here is one of my all time favorite songs of theirs. It has become my theme song. Especially when I get sad about my life and things I don't have that I want in life that are righteous desires. I listen to this song and remember that I will wait. Enjoy:



And THIS is Emma's song. This is soooo Emma's song. This is her the entire first book. I don't even know if I believe. Dang It's like they wrote this song just for her. I LOVE it so so SO much.

3 Posts in 1 Week?! What the what?!

I know, I know, you're wishing I wouldn't have gotten back on the blogging bandwagon, BUT, I am trying to focus more on my writing and this is a good way for me to do that. I can talk to you, my dear readers, and talk through all of my problems. And give you random scraps of stuff that I write. Hehehe. I know you love ALL THE THINGS, right? Right.

So, without further ado, an excerpt of LIGHTS that I wrote today. This is when Emma and Ian are talking together. They've talked a couple of times, but still don't really know each other. It's still definitely a work in progress and this is soooo rough, but it gives you an idea. It's like a pre sketch if I were an artist with pencils and colors instead of words.

I walk briskly down the street to the hospital. I check my phone. It's nearly 9:00. I look in the coffee shop as I pass. Ian isn't in his spot. Just as I pass the doors, one of them swings open barely missing me.

“Sorry, mate! I didn't see-” Ian's panicked voice hits me before I actually see him. I stop and turn to see him walking, book in hand, the same direction I have stopped.

“Oh! Hi! Oh, no worries, you didn't hit me with the door.” I am surprised at the cheeriness in my own voice. As if I am excited to see Ian.

“That's a relief. I must have been walking absentmindedly.” He answers as I start to walk away. He starts walking the same direction. I give him a sideways glance. He notices and responds, “I work down here just a couple of blocks, where are you headed?” His reasoning is sound, I don't know why I momentarily freaked out when he started walking to same way as me.

“Oh, uh, just down here to Children's Memorial. They've had a busy morning, so I have to go in and see if I can help.”I am surprised by the ease I am in able to talk to him.

“Ah, A nurse? Doctor? Cafeteria worker?” He asks nonchalantly, and yet I feel so comfortable I momentarily forget that I really don't know him..

“Oh, I'm a doctor. I've been here for about three years now. It's the greatest job in the world. I love helping kids.”

“A kid doctor. That is impressive.” He says. I smile at his approval.

“Yeah, I lost my mom in a car accident as a kid and I was in the car too. The doctors that saved my life really changed the way I see the world and I wanted to be like them so I grew up and became a doctor.”

“You are a remarkable woman, Emma.” His words are rich and full of respect. I blush slightly at the admiration. Before I could respond, my phone went off again. It was work.

“Excuse me for just a second?” I ask. He nods as I turn to talk on the phone.

“False alarm, Emma. We've got it covered. We'll keep you posted if anything else happens.” Marques's deep voice tells me before I can get a word in.

“Okay, thanks. Definitely keep me posted. Okay, bye” I hang up the phone. Ian is glancing over at the horizon.

“Sorry about that. I guess they don't need me after all.”

“Is the child okay, I take it?”

“Oh. Oh, no, I help out in the ER from time to time if they get too slammed and need an extra pair of hands.”

“You just keep getting more and more impressive, don't you?” He winks at me.

“Thank you, but I just do what I can to help people. It's not anything to really take notice of.” Ian smiles and laughs lightly to himself. I ask, “What is it?”

“You just remind me of my girlfriend. Quite a lot, actually.” He has a girlfriend?

“Oh?” I say.

“She's a very kind and considerate person. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with her.” My curiosity was getting the best of me. I was so intrigued by this unknown woman who had his heart. I almost felt a little jealous.

“Tell me about her.” I state. I didn't even ask.

“She's beautiful. The kind of beauty that you come across once in a lifetime. Everything about her is beautiful. Her hair, her lips, her voice, the way that she walks, everything. I was drawn to her from the moment I saw her and have never looked back. She is my guardian angel. She guides me through the storms I face and pushes me to be the best version of myself.” He speaks with such confidence I feel a little intimidated by her. I also know doubt he has ever actually flirted with me. The way he talks about his love is unmistakable. It's almost like she there with him even though she's not.

“Where is she?” I ask.

“She's back home. I'm only out here for another few weeks. She came to visit a couple weeks ago. We've gone back and forth while I've been working here. Hopefully soon I can just work close to home and be with her. I think she'd like that too.” There was a slight falter in his words, as if he was hoping this would happen more than it being a sure thing.

“I hope that happens for you. Everyone deserves to be with the one they love.” I hoped these words would be true for him.

“Thank you. I hope that things work out with you and your boyfriend as well.” He sounded genuine, but I suddenly felt like my relationship with Trent was so small in comparison to Ian and his love.

“Ha. We are just starting out. We've only been together for about six months. We've only just started talking about moving in together. I mean we spend so much time together we might as well. I'm tired of the back and forth of his place and mine. I'd really rather just wake up next to him in the same place each night, you know?” I didn't even think about the words as I said them until I noticed Ian's expression. He tried to hide it, but it was almost a twinge of pain as I talked about moving in with Trent. I don't understand. I quickly change the subject.

“Any way, I better let you get to work. I should head back home. I've got a whole day to get back to.” I turn to leave.

“Emma, wait.” I stop as he says my name. I don't want to face him. I don't want to see the judgement in his eyes. He continues any way, “I just hope that you are truly happy. Regardless of what I may have said or not said, I hope you are happy. Truly. With all my heart I hope you find what you're looking for.”

“Thanks.” I whisper and as I turn to finally face him, he's gone. Not just down the street a ways, but completely gone. I feel tears forming in the corners of my eyes. What is going on? I look at my phone. It's 10:22. How can an hour and a half already have passed? I shake off the feeling of loss and disapproval that has snuck in and head back to my apartment.  

Sooooooo.......what did you think? That ended up being A LOT longer on here than it did on the page I was writing it on....weird. Any way, hit or miss? Or neither? I have no idea! I just know that I like where this is going. Because at the beginning you think it's a typical love story and then BAM I throw you into time and space and craziness and awesomeness and fighting and life and death type stuff. It's great. I love it. 

Accomplished

There is a God in Israel, my friends. I PASSED MATH. Hallelujah!!!!! I can't believe it!!! I'm so happy!!! AND, I got A's in my screenwriting and English classes! Such a fantastic way to end the semester!

So, for Screenwriting we had to write a feature length work. I decided to make LIGHTS a movie. It was amazing and challenging at the same time. I turned it in to my teacher and got 4 single spaced pages of critique back. I have a lot of things to work on, but I am very excited for the challenge to make my story even better!! I'm so glad that I have this summer to focus on writing! It's the best!!!

New Movie Idea

So, I have to write a 15 minute movie for my screen writing class and I had this GENIUS idea. What if I wrote the first scene of LIGHTS into a movie? Wouldn't that be AMAZING?!?!?! And the answer, obviously, is YES. ABSOLUTELY. UNDOUBTABLY. YES. So, as soon as I finish it, I will post it on here for you to catch an early glimpse. Ta-da! Be excited. I know you can't wait! It's going to LEGEN-WAIT-FOR-IT-DARY!!!! LEGENDARY!!!

And then they all died. It was sad. I ugly cried. It was horrible.

     I feel like all of my favorite shows are killing off main characters. I hate it when they do this. Downton Abbey being at the top of the list. SERIOUSLY GUYS, what's wrong with you writers?!?!?!!?  Stop the hate! Stop the killing!! Just let my characters live and give them drama some other way!!!!!! At least Sherlock isn't *actually* dead. But seriously. Stop the dying-ness peoples! Maybe I'll just become a screenwriter so that I have a say in who lives and who dies!!
I told myself I HAD to work on homework today...right now, in fact....so, of course I'm writing on my blog instead. Obviously. I've been thinking a lot about life lately. What I want, where I'm going, what I want out of it, you know, the usual questions. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but every year around my birthday I write a letter to my future husband. Sounds odd, I'm sure, but it's kind of a marker for me to check back and see where I've come from and what I hope for in the future. Any way, I started this year's letter back in January and didn't finish it. I picked it back up this last weekend and finished it without reading the beginning, then I went back and read the whole thing. I surprised myself quite a bit. The first part of my letter was really sad. Like really sad. I think I was freaking out about being 28 and not married (and if anyone reading this isn't LDS, or from Utah, you probably don't see that as a bad thing) and I kind of wrote it out in a letter. But then, this last weekend (and the last few weeks) I have just been really positive and LOVING life and looking forward to some huge new changes ahead for me. And so I wrote those out in my letter too and it was really surprising to me that I have been really down lately. I hadn't really noticed.
     Any way, yeah, life-it's getting better. I have been working on LIGHTS a lot lately and I am so in love with Ian and Emma and their relationship. I'm going to take them to the very edge, though. I'm going to make them question everything and they're going to have to rely on each other and hope that somehow they don't die and make it out together. I think that this is the best way for me to solidify how much they care about each other. Also, it adds the drama needed to promote a story. Because what is a story without an issue or drama? A boring sugar coated story that is hard to relate to, because we all have problems. We do, it's just the way things work. So, don't hate me when you think Ian is dead or Emma has forgotten about him. It'll be okay, I promise. Trust me, I'm the writer :)
     In other news, I have been baking up a storm lately and I have to say that I am so proud of myself when I finish a project whether its baking or sewing or writing. I love creating things, and I love accomplishing them too! It's awesome!! I'll post pictures soon. Because they're fantastic!!!
     Um....I think that is about it. Life is GREAT!!! I love writing and baking and everything about my life right now. I'm working on some things that I'll blog about later, but for now, I'm doing good and hope you are too!!!

Soozee's Obsessions (or as I often say in reference to them, Sorry, K?)

I can sometimes become easily addicted to things. Lately they are usually of a British fashion and generally on TV. As I previously mentioned, I had a birthday a couple of weeks ago. It was so fantastic!!! And my cake. Oh, my cake. It was AMAZING thanks to my sister in law who did most of the work on it. I helped a little, mostly in the placing of characters (so the universe wouldn't end by having three different doctors in the same place at the same time.) and getting the colors just write (TARDIS blue is a bit tricky...) any way, instead of writing up a whole blog about it, my sister in law did and she put it in so much better words than I ever could. Check it out here. You won't regret it, I promise!

So, I love Doctor Who, we all know that. I think the entire world knows that I like Doctor Who. It's a fantastic show and I've seen all the episodes from the 2005 reboot to present. That's a lot when I think about it.

 I also recently watched another British show that I had heard a lot about. It's called Merlin.
 And I kind of fell in love with it. There's 5 seasons in total, the show just ended and I watched them all in about 2 weeks. No, my grades aren't suffering because of it...yet. BUT, I finished it the night before last and although I love the show it was over, and the end of things always brings a twinge of sadness with it, even if the story ends happy. It ends. And I don't like endings. Because then there's no more. It's gone. And that is always a little bit sad.

Having said that, I will tell you this about Merlin, it follows Prince/King Arthur in Camelot and the knights of the round table, only the story begins when both Merlin and Arthur are young and they kind of grow up together. At the beginning Arthur's father, Uther Pendragon has outlawed magic, which is bad because Merlin is the most powerful sorcerer to ever walk the face of the Earth.

 There's your opening to the story. I think we all know the ill fated story of Arthur and Guinevere and Lancelot and all that garbage in the original story, but that is why I love this show so much. They don't have any of the smuttyness that is in the original story. They keep the characters strong and true to the values that they originally stood for. Arthur remains strong and true to his kingdom and his people. Guinevere doesn't betray him and stays faithful to him. And Lancelot is a really cool guy. At first I didn't want to like him, but then something happened and I was like "okay, I can like him" and yeah...now it's over. But it is a good show.

I can honestly say I have not literally laughed out loud so much watching a show in a really really long time. The writers are geniuses and the banter between Arthur and Merlin is so funny. I really really liked it (obviously). And the guy that plays Arthur (Bradley James) is kind of the type of guy that I see Ian as from my story Lights. If I ever finish that book, and if it ever gets published, and if everyone loves it enough that they make it into a movie, I'm going to petition that if he's not to old by the time all this happens, that he plays Ian, because I think that would be brilliant. That's a lot of if's, I know, but when you dream, dream big, right?

1/1/13...that's a lot of 1s

Oh my gosh, I'm so tired. I hit 4 different parties last night. Got home around 3, slept in a bit and I am still thinking that is NEVER happening again. Too much running around. BUT, it was great to see so many people! I also saw a really fantastic fireworks show put on by my pyro of a brother. He was like a little kid on Christmas morning. Okay, maybe not THAT excited, but I know he had fun, and I had fun watching them all go off.
    Christmas was amazing! It was just super great! I got some really awesome presents and got to spend time with my amazing family. Also, I thought my car had died, but it didn't!!!! That was STUPENDOUS!! A quick fix and my good little Logan car is back on his feet!...or tires?? But yeah, he's fine and I'm back to the freedom having a car permits.
     It's 2013. That's crazy. I enter this new year with high hopes and hopefully big plans. School, of course, is part of that plan. I also want to finish either Lights, or Changing Tyde. Either one would be fabulous. I'd like to get the ball rolling on that whole dream. I also am kind of hoping Dean Carmichael shows up sometime. That would be amazing. BUT, he might not come this year, or ever (and I can hear the protests about me being young and all that....) I know that when I turn 28 in about a month doesn't make me that old, and there is definitely still hope that I will get married, but it might not happen, and if it doesn't, I'm still going to have an AMAZING life. Focused on the goals I have regardless of my marital status.
    A good friend of mine blogged about Plan A and Plan B and starting to focus on Plan B because Plan A doesn't look like it's going to work out and how hard it is to give up on the plan you really wanted for one you just set aside in case. I have felt this way MANY times. And I love this dear friend so much!!
    One thing I love about last summer was that I spent the summer focusing on me and what I really wanted in life and I set goals and plans that I like to call my Plan AB. I am going to accomplish these plans and goals whether or not Dean comes around. He might be super busy right now, and maybe he died in the war in heaven, you know? I can't spend the rest of my life wishing him here, because that obviously doesn't work. ha ha.
    But, it is hard at times when it seems everyone who had even the slightest possibility of a relationship is now engaged. A couple of weeks ago every day Facebook informed me of a different friend that had just gotten engaged. I really started to avoid social networking for a while. This next year is going to be really awesome, or really really depressing. I think I'll go back to avoiding wedding receptions. Sometimes, it's just easier that way.
    Now that I have successfully brought down the mood of my blog....Um, I have been working a lot on LIGHTS lately and I fall more and more in love with those characters the more I write them into existence. Ian and Emma are such amazing and beautiful people. They are both such strong fighters, which is good because I am going to put them through quite the journey. I can see that story turning into a series, which will be awesome. I am so excited. I stay up late and write sometimes. I can't help it!!! I love it so much!!!!

...and for your reading pleasure...

I know its been a while since I posted...November...what can I say? Its always a rough month! Any way, I had this idea for a story a while back and have been playing with it. In the first chapter the main character, Emmalee, meets this intriguing guy named Ian. Here is what she first sees: I had never seen anyone quite like him. There was an air about him that pulled me in. He was charismatic without speaking. He was twenty feet away and I couldn't comprehend anything beyond this moment. He was tall, at least 6' 2". He had sandy blonde hair that was organized chaos. His green eyes caught every fleck of light which made them shine so brightly. The only thing that could have been brighter was his smile. It was a knowing, teasing smile that was like a magnet. His clothing was well fitted. From his white with a blue pin stripe running down it to his well tailored khakis. He had rolled up the long sleeves of his shirt which I generally would have scoffed at, but he made it look so good. On his right hand he wore a ring. At first it looked simple, but I noticed it was catching each fleck of light around as his hand moved. It had the strangest effect on me; I wanted to see it more closely. His watch also caught the same light from his left wrist. It's definitely a work in progress, but hopefully you caught a glimpse of him. I love Ian. He's so awesome. He's got so much mystery about him that you're always wanting to know more and more about him, but he won't tell you. It's a secret. And Emmalee is a dancer. A really really good dancer. She does ballet. She's ridiculously good at it. And then she meets Ian and her whole world changes. I've got a working title of "Lights" for it. And I love it. I'm also gradually putting together a playlist that I listen to while writing it. I'll share it with you soon! Any way, I have 3 8-10 page papers due by next week, so you probably won't hear from me until Christmas and I will tell you a story! A real story from my actual real life!! YAY!!!!